I posted this elsewhere a few months ago. Thought I'd repost it here.
First, I'd like to apologise for failing to capture this giant accident crackling out of my bum. Like most Metamucil poos, the pressure built very quickly.
I'd decided earlier in the day to have a complete Metamucil gorge. I didn't poo the previous day, so I knew I had a big "starter poo" that I could swell up with Metamucil. I had my customary triple-dose - 3x 3-scoop glasses - around lunch time, and followed up more 3-scoop glasses every hour or so for the rest of the afternoon. I was feeling very full and farting quite a lot come dinner time.
Often, a Metamucil gorge will take about 6 hours or so to make me need a poo. But sometimes, for reasons I haven't yet figured out, the need to poo doesn't materialise. In this case, I generally end up busting out a sloppy whopper the next morning. By the time 10pm came, I still didn't need to do a poo. I'd had a my triple dose at about noon, and had top-ups at least every hour - more than 10 times the normal daily dose! I resigned myself to the fact that I wouldn't be doing a poo in my pants that evening.
In lieu of pooing myself, I decided to go to the supermarket to grab a couple of things. They would be closing at 11pm, but it's no more than 250 metres from my door. I walked to the supermarket, picked out what I wanted, and went to the self-serve checkout. All this time, I'm still doing some giant farts. They're very muffled and quiet, but extremely long. As I scan my items, I begin to feel a different kind of pressure. Now I feel something solid pressing against my anus...
As I've said, Metamucil poos tend to build fast. Normally, the need to poo builds gradually over time; and even if I'm really busting to do a poo, I can hold it in for a fair while. Metamucil accelerates the whole process. I can go from not needing to poo at all, to being super busting to do a poo, in a minute or so.
So as I scanned my items, I felt the hard mass of the previous 2 days' poo press against my anus. I now needed to poo. As soon as I noticed this, the Metamucil began to join the party. Although it only took me another 30 seconds or so to finish scanning my items and wave my MasterCard at the magic machine, by the time I'd done it I was barely holding it in. It felt like somebody was inflating a basketball in my bowels. The pressure came in violent surges, each wave filling my bowels more and more. I acted as casual as I could, as I made my way out the door. I was trying not to telegraph the fact that I badly needed to poo. As I walked through the car park, under cover of darkness, I started to shuffle, squirm and press my hand against my bum crack, trying my hardest to avoid pooing my pants. It took me less than 3 minutes to walk here from home. The return journey would take much longer. I had to walk so slowly, and take numerous pauses to squirm and grab my bum. At the speed I could manage, it would take at least 20 minutes to get home. I was almost certain I wouldn't be able to hold it in that long.
I struggled my way down my street toward home. About half way, I felt a massive surge in pressure. The hard "starter poo" started forcing it's way out. It wasn't that big, but the firmness was enough to force my anus open enough to let the Metamucil mountain follow it out. What followed were alternating waves of sloppy Metamucil poo and giant farts. Huge waves of super soft and sloppy poo would crackle out into my undies, and the giant farts would bubble and gurgle in through the sloppy mountain. This was the most violent poo I'd ever done, I was wincing and tearing up as my bum practically exploded into my undies. Even though the immense pressure made the poo come out faster than any poo I've ever done, there was so much that it still took a couple of minutes to finish bursting out. I don't know how I managed to deal with the pressure as long as I did.
I sighed the biggest sigh of relief when it was done. I knew it was a whopper, but I had to cup it with my hand to see just how much I'd pooed my undies. It wasn't the biggest poo I'd ever done, but it comfortable ranks in the top 5. relieved, I managed to make it the rest of the way home. The sheer size of the poo meant that I needed to walk with a fairly pronounced "Pooed-My-Pants Waddle".
I had to make a film record, just so i could remember this amazing poo accident. As I was cupping my pooed undies, I noticed that I'd swollen up a pretty sizeable stiffy. I simply had to hump in these pooed undies. When would I ever get the chance to hump with such a huge poo..? I set up the camera in my bedroom and went to town on my favourite pillow. It took about 5 minutes for me to cream all through the front of my pooed undies.
You might notice I used some artistic license with the sound, including raising the pitch and adding a couple of effects. I was playing around in iMovie, and I just found it amusing. So I left it in.